:: greatness is a life well-lived ::

remembering Columbine...7 years ago

It was my senior year at Lakeview High, a few weeks left of school. I was in that "almost finished" mode where your mind is beyond capacity and/or you're in the "whatever" mode. I was barely aware of my surroundings and mindlessly walked the halls from class to class, just couldn't wait to be finished.

4.20.99 was a day that shook me deeply and left an impression that, to this day, has changed my life. I remember Columbine.

When I got home from school that day, I was glued to the tv watching the events in Littleton, Colorado. My heart broke with grief and sadness for what was happening. I saw the deep fear and pain and confusion in the students' eyes, their worlds utterly shaken. I resonated with what was happening there and the tragedy hit home.

The next day at school, my heart beat a little faster, my eyes were open much wider, I was aware of my classmates and those who walked the halls with me. I knew of kids who I thought might fit into that "outcast" group like the Columbine shooters. I was paranoid and afraid. It could have easily been Lakeview High. My library, my lunchroom, my teachers, my friends, me.

And then the stories began coming out...Cassie Bernall and Rachel Scott the most memorable...two girls right around my own age, who loved Jesus and were striving to love others around them, who lost their lives that day, but stood for Jesus and gained Christ that day.

My faith was challenged. Would I have withstood that kind of challenge? Would I have been too afraid and ashamed to stand for Jesus? Would I have left a legacy that would inspire and challenge others to pursue God despite the struggles and hardships of life? Would I have brought honor to God through my life and death and witness? Would I choose Christ above everything else, even life itself?

Those questions unsettled me forever. And I still ask them to myself. And perhaps someday I will have to face the answers to those questions. And perhaps in some little ways, I face the answers every day in the choices I make.

There are some things in life that leave their mark forever.

For me, Columbine is one of those.

However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace. ~ Acts 20:24

For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.
~ Philippians 1:21

posted by FaithChristine @ 23:20